Faith

We miss Maddy so much.  Our house just seems to be so quiet without her.

It takes a lot of energy to get through each day, but somehow God provides us with what we need to make it through.

Today, we found out that someone from Archbold who "Got Swabbed" at the Bone Marrow Drive done in honor of Maddy was contacted as a potential bone marrow match.  It is things like this that renew our Faith and give us some comfort knowing that something good has come out of all this.



P.S.

On March 18, 2013, Terry Henricks is hosting a St. Baldrick's event again.  The money raised through the St. Baldrick's Foundation goes directly the childhood cancer research.  You can check it out at:

http://www.stbaldricks.org/events/mypage/4276/2013

A Special Person

We have a lot of special people in our lives who have continued to support us in our time of need these past few weeks, but one person who has been amazing and has shown us HOPE, FAITH, and COURAGE through these tough days has been Julia-  Maddy's big sis and best friend.   It seems odd, but Julia has consoled us more than we have had to console her.  She is BRAVE and STRONG!  We are so blessed to have her in our lives!

Just last week, Mrs. Hurst gave us a few more of Maddy's school papers.  In them was a paragraph that Maddy wrote back in August.  It seems so appropriate to share:

A Special Person

by:  Maddy Lambert

     My older sister Julia is very special.  I can tell her anything.  She also plays with me.  It is so much fun. I like it when she helps me with things.  Julia does a lot of things for me.  My older sister Julia is AWESOME!

Dinner

For the past month we have been trying to keep busy- running to ball games and other events and just grabbing supper on the run or at a restaurant. Tonight was the first time in a long time that we actually cooked dinner and sat down at the table to eat- something we always looked forward to doing before but sometimes took for granted.  Tonight though, sitting at our table for four with one chair empty, was a sad reminder again of how a part of "us" is gone.

Note to self-  Take time to sit down as a family for a meal and NEVER take it for granted!

One Day At a Time

The author of a book on grieving I am reading said-  When you lose a parent, you lose your past.  When you lose a child, you lose your future.  Right now, that is what is so hard to think about- the future.  I find myself thinking I can make it through a day and then I start to think about the future.  Don't get me wrong- I still have moments when I feel guilty and angry about things I should have done differently in the past, but it is when I let myself think about tomorrow, or Maddy's birthday, or the holidays, or ....  that I get overcome with sadness.  The "experts" say to take it one day at a time.  I guess that is good, because I can't manage more than that.

I found this poem and it seems so appropriate and so like something Maddy would call me out on!

Ask My Mom How She Is

My Mom, she tells a lot of lies,

She never did before.

But from now until she dies,

She'll tell a whole lot more.

Ask my Mom how she is

And because she can't explain,

She will tell a little lie

Because she can't describe the pain.

Ask my Mom how she is,

She'll say "I'm alright."

If that's the truth, then tell me,

why does she cry each night?

Ask my Mom how she is,

She seems to cope so well.

She didn't have a choice you see,

Nor the strength to yell.

Ask my Mom how she is,

"I'm fine, I'm well, I'm coping."

For God's sake Mom, just tell the truth,

Just say your heart is broken.

She'll love me all her life,

I loved her all of mine.

But if you ask her how she is,

She'll lie and say she's fine.

I am Here in Heaven.

I cannot hug from here.

If she lies to you don't listen,

Hug her and hold her near.

On the day we meet again,

We'll smile and I'll be bold.

I'll say, "You're lucky to get in here, Mom,

With all the lies you told!"

-Unknown